Youth sports guidance for the church? What would Cyprian do …

Cyprian, an early church father, pastored during a period known for the “lapsed controversy.” During the rule of Rome’s emperor, Decius, many Christians renounced their faith under threat of persecution or death. When peace returned, these believers sought to be readmitted to the church—which was deeply divided on how to respond.

A different issue has many modern pastors wondering how to respond: how to minister and guide families who are incredibly busy—and often absent from church—due to youth sports. Though Cyprian wouldn’t have understood our relationship between sports and the church, I believe his pastoral approach offers valuable insights for how we shepherd families navigating the world of youth athletics today.

Strive toward the goal

When confronted with two extremes regarding how to deal with the lapsed church members—either excommunication or not holding them accountable at all—Cyprian considered telos, a Greek word that means goal or purpose. The purpose of the church’s pastor is to care for the flock (1 Peter 5:2–3). Cyprian wanted the lost sheep to return—not cheaply, but authentically. He also wanted the church to welcome them back.

Challenge your families to think about telos. Many parents, including those with children in sports, have never thought about what the goal of such an overcommitted life is or whether it’s good or bad. This busy stage of life may be a great opportunity to pastor them toward God’s goal.

Know your players

How did Cyprian resist both extremes? He emphasized discernment regarding the lapsed church members on a case-by-case basis. In our modern context, some absences from church may stem from family pressure, lack of spiritual maturity, or cultural expectations. A wise pastor discerns individual motives and applies compassion while maintaining truth.

Many parents have been deceived by the promise of a scholarship that coaches promise to young athletes who are fully dedicated. Others just enjoy the thrill of watching their child—it truly is a joy. Regardless, it is our job as pastors to guide them. We should insist that absence from church is not good for them, but at the same time, not lash out at them from the pulpit.

Emphasize teamwork and unity

Cyprian understood the church is a visible and unified body. He taught reconciliation not just for individuals, but for the health of the whole community. He believed that when true Christians are apart from the church, it hurts both them and the church. “Think not that you are thus maintaining the gospel of Christ when you separate yourselves from the flock of Christ,” he once said. He strove for unity by bringing back those who were absent and by softening those who opposed their return.

If you have a hard heart toward those missing from your church, pray for them. If you don’t see anything wrong with long sports absences, think about the unity of Christ’s church and the sheep for which He died.

Practice gentle correction

Like Cyprian, a pastor must remind absent members of the importance of worship and fellowship with their local church. The lessons learned in sports are valuable, but the local church is God’s Plan A. There is no substitute. Roll up your sleeves and do the hard work of shepherding your individual members. Be patient with them, but be firm.

Cyprian’s world and ours are very different, but his pastoral heart remains a model worth following. He led with conviction, compassion, and clarity—holding fast to truth while never giving up on those who strayed.

In a culture where Sunday games compete with Sunday worship, pastors must do the same.